queen tina says.
“30 is not the new 20.”
i often feel adrift in the sea of adulthood. especially as a female opera singer who is perpetually told that she won’t hit her vocal peak for another 10 years, i often feel like these years are irrelevant, that i’m just killing time.
this ted talk is wonderful for anyone who feels like i do and should be watched by everyone i know. the high points:
“30 is not the new 20. don’t be defined by what you didn’t know or didn’t do. claim your adulthood.”
and i will now. thank you Meg Jay.
boudreaux has been picking up on my energy tonight. this our last night in the apartment, just the two of us. he hasn’t left my side and when i sit down, he sits as physically close to me as he can. i feel excited and scared and nervous and melancholy and nostalgic all at once, and so does he. tonight he will sleep curled against me, like he has every night for the past two and a half years, but this is the last night we sleep alone. we have been Han and Chewie, piloting our own ship at light speed, but now big changes are coming for us. they’re good changes, but big changes nonetheless.
wish us luck.
look, i just get really attached to things like tv shows and food processors and the piles upon piles of books i have stacked around my apartment. i don’t want to get rid of newspaper clippings or half written poems or love letters written from friends, not boys. i see myself in places i shouldn’t. things have an emotional core and we don’t realize they have an emotional core until it’s time to let go and i’m not ready to let go, okay? there are pieces of my life that have been buried deep for years and years and i don’t have very much time to decide what comes and what stays. it’s hard and i didn’t think it would be.
“So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.”
so gatsby was perfect.
han & leia